Malarga Manitham ( May 2015 )

 Malarga Manitham ( May 2015 )

Translated By : Mr  Arunkumar (Bangalore)

Question/Answer

Question: We are having friendship with a person. I trusted. He cheated me. He betrayed me so I was away from him. After coming to HUE,

I forgiven him and resumed my friendship. Again he betrayed me. Then what is the use of forgiving him? what is the benefit of

accepting him as friend again? He has not all changed. What is the explanation for this?

Answer: I will separate this question into 3 or 4 portions and will provide the explanation. 1. Who is your friend? 2. Whether he cheated you?

or you are being cheated? Who cheated you? 3. Will he change if you forgive him? 4. What is meant by forgive?

1. Who is your friend, How you identify your friend is the question.

I classify the friends as five types. 1. Friendship formed through give and take - converts to a friend. 2. Contact formed during 

travel might have converted as friend. 3. Friendship formed by giving might have converted as friend. 4. He could be a soul mate.

5. He could be a permanent friend.

1. Friend formed through give and take - we are doing business. Happens to contact. Sending and receiving money. we are helping during

difficult times and losses. We call them as friend. Suddenly we are asking for help but we did not get, then we say 'Are you a friend' 

and breaking the friendship that is we are closing the relationship as a friend.

2. Either it could be journey of life or travel via vehicle we speak about others. We come to know the thought waves seem to match.

We even collect address and phone number. Connect with them. We join in the friend list. We totally trust and accept. During talking, 

we are habituated to criticize the other, when talking about others, positive thinkings were changed to negative thinkings. 

Later, we begin to think that we trusted him and told others stories to him, then out of fear we may think that he may 

blame us so whether to keep him a friend or an enemy, to keep in mouth or swallow?

3. May be who came to offer help might have changed to a friend. Without sharing our inner feelings, the other person might have sensed

our trouble, he himself came forward and helped with gratitude and connected with us as a friend. We can trust them.

4. Soul mate - the friendship might have started from the childhood - it continues to be the same story till today. Whenever we meet, we exchange the feelings, support during

difficult times, understand others feelings. What is their habit? What is their way of working? How do they look like? In a nutshell, understrand their totality completely and work

accordingly.

5. Permanent friend - Who is he? He is the one who created us. Even if we leave, he will not leave us, he will love us even we don't love him. He will be with us from the day we 

formed in the womb till our death. First four friends we should believe. But at the same time we should not believe them. We should have faith with them. At the same time 

we should not have faith with them. Do you think it as a puzzle? I will tell in another way.

How to trust these 5 friends?

First two friends should be kept before the gate of the home. Third and fourth friends should be kept in the middle of the home. Fifth friend should be kept above our head.

Still not able to understand? Before isolating the friends between these two and adding to the friends list ask the fifth friend. The wisdom that he gives us will 

help to isolate and show us. It will isolate and show the thief as thief and friend as friend. How the Ostrich isolates the fire and water in the same way we can also isolate.

UE students can do this isolation easily. Since the chakras are opened 100% to whomever we connect with, speak, sense from which chakra their energy level is operating, 

check our basic level love circle and trust them in accordance to which circle you are placing them. In accordance to that share your life with them. We should keep in our mind.

Human is human only. Human will change everyday. The human who is present today will not be there tomorrow. Should believe, should not believe, should have faith, should not have faith.

God has given us the intelligence to reason out (rational). So reason out and identify.

I will explain the second portion of the question. He has cheated me. He betrayed me. Whom you are blaming? Who is responsible for this crime? He is asking you.

Who asked you to believe me? Did i shared anything of myself to you? Who asked you to share with me? Did i asked you? Do we realize only if he says you are a fool?

How many times did i tell you? "We are responsible for what we do and speak". The truth is this does not transform to you as your mother thought. You repeat this again and again.

"I was dissappointed". "I failed because I trusted". Like this "Ego" uniqueness says for ten times, then mind, how you are disappointed?. Why you trusted? It will teach 

you many lessons on whom to trust. We can do mistake once. Once we learned the lessons from the mistakes, the mind will not allow to do the same mistake again. So, we will take

responsibility of what we do and speak.

Third portion of the question: I have forgiven and resumed by friendship. But he did not change. What is meant by "Forgive"? Why should we forgive. Is it good for us 

if we forgive others? Is it good for him? When love transforms to a friendship we get the relationship. When we break the friendship we are breaking the relationship. That relationship,

breaks our peace and happiness. When mind is broken, mind gets tired. As soon as the mind is tired, evil force enters, see, see he has cheated you right? Like this it triggers

the emotion and silence the mind. It triggers the anger and resentment. Enmity is developed. It makes to take revenge. If we take revenge, it will not show the consequences to our mind.

He will trigger until it converts to action. After completing it, he will leave and run away. After he disappears, awareness comes to our mind. Then we need to face the consequences.

This is what we call it as the work of Evil/satan. If we want to escape from this, we need to go towards alternate action.

"I was disappointed". For this disappointment only I am responsible. Somehow I was disappointed, like this we say to ourself manytimes. We may feel sad as soon as we are disappointed.

But will not get anger. Our mind will start to work. It will point our mistakes. Your soul will say you have learned this lessons, so say thanks, thanks to him. Mind will hesitate.

If we want to win the hesitation and say thanks, we should forgive the grief in our emotion. I forgive the grief created by him. Only forgiveness helps to resume the lost relationship,

peace and happiness again. Keep this mind. Forgiving is for us and not for others. Saying, he is not changing even if i forgive him, means you have not understood the nature of forgiveness.

We get the benefit of forgiveness and not others.

Only reading this is not sufficient. Think, meditate and acquire the benefits.

Author.